July 3, 2013

July Non Beauty Favorites

I've probably lost close to 50 lbs since January but it's all for shit because I've gained 52. If I ever want to ask myself why, why Vanessa, why do you never lose weight? I don't need to look any further than these non beauty favorites posts.

Ray's Hell Burger
Two regular guys eating at the original Ray's
First off, I'm not a burger person. I've never even had a burger from McDonald's or any other fast food chain. Ever. I can't stand most burgers. Ray's is my only burger exception. Ray's is too good. For people who don't know, Ray's Hell Burger is a small burger place in Rosslyn, VA where you can pick out a specialty burger from their menu or build your own by combining different toppings. I finally worked out my perfect combination - an au proivre burger with pepperjack cheese, pickles and Heck sauce - and I could happily forsake all other burgers if it was asked of me. I've eaten at Ray's three times this month. I'm not even sorry. A burger has to be pretty good if you're willing to drive down M Street in Georgetown to get over Key Bridge for it even once but 3 times in 30 days? Out of this world.

The only pain about Ray's in that it has a new name and location pretty much every year. Technically, it's not even called Ray's Hell Burger anymore. I'm pretty sure the new name is Ray's To The Third and they're down the street from the little strip mall that housed their three former locations. Their new restaurant is a lot more put together than any of their other locations and you get to sit down to order so I hope they stay put in their current spot for good.

Goldfish
Goldfish crackers are pretty much all I've had in terms of snacks this month. Regular Golfish, pizza Goldfish, flavor blasted Goldfish - I have bought and consumed them all. My all time favorite variety of Goldfish are these french toast kind which is basically just cinnamon graham crackers in little fish shapes. Graham cracker Goldfish make up my entire food pyramid now. They have a bunch of other "New!" varieties which are obviously for chumps because these are the best snack ever.

Salt Water Taffy
I can't live with myself if I'm down the shore and don't pick up some salt water taffy. Salt water taffy is something of a Jersey state food. It's a tradition, like long nails or adding extraneous W's to words or secretly liking Chris Christie. Banana salt water taffy from the Jersey shore is my desert island favorite candy and I'm pretty sure I ate a little over a pound of it in the course of a day.

Aloe Vera Gel
I tried to tan for one day in June. I reapplied SPF 30 every hour. I was meticulous with the application. I laid out for only about 5 hours. And I got hideously sunburned. It was comical how sunburned I was. I had non sunburned areas literally in the shapes of my fingers on my stomach because every square inch that sunblock didn't touch burned. The above photo is this miniscule portion of my wrist that I apparently missed during one of my 5+ sunblock applications. I got sunburned on my feet but not on my legs and had a literal line that made my feet look like I was wearing bright red socks.

I TOLD YOU!

Not two weeks later, my boyfriend's family came to visit and we went to Arlington Cemetery for about two hours and I got sunburned again all over my shoulders and chest. I've probably used aloe vera more than I've used shampoo this month. I'm still peeling and covered in weird tan lines so it's kind of concerning to think about how far gone I'd be without slathering my entire body in green gel. My psyche is the thing that will truly never recover. You grow up with certain expectations about tanning when you move to Jersey at age four. They never tell you your great grandparents are from a country whose primary battle tactic is to just let their enemies freeze to death if they try to invade. Sun is not my friend.

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